We had a list of criteria in place to choose a name for our daughter, who also has a hyphenated last name. We took a fair amount of grief for the hyphenation at the time, but for the past 2 1/2 years it really hasn't been a huge issue. It takes an extra minute to spell everything out, but most people we encounter are on board with everyone having different last names. For what it's worth, when either my husband or I are traveling alone with our daughter, having each of our last names as a part of her last name makes is easier than if she had a wholly different last name from one of us.

Our criteria were as follows:
1) Must be pronounceable on sight
2) Must be spellable when heard spoken
3) No variant spellings
4) Must pass the "Senator" test ("Senator Blank Blank announced last week...")
5) Must fail the "Stripper" test ("Next up, on our mainstage, as a naughty schoolgirl, Blaaaaank")
6) Must be equally appropriate for a child and an adult (because babies grow up - people forget this)
7) Should have good nick-name/shortened name potential, but stand up on its own as well
8) Should not call to mind profanity, diseases, or genitals
9) Doesn't create initials that spell anything bad or weird

We ruled out family names for various reasons, then went through a baby name book on a long car trip while I was pregnant. I read aloud names that I liked, which my husband than said yes or no to. Anything that he said yes to (and therefore, we both liked) went on a list. That got us down to about 20 or 30 names and we lived with that list for a while before editing it further. At that point it was pretty clear to us what our favorite was, so we started looking at the list for names that went well with the chosen first name and hyphenated last name. We picked a longish (3 syllable) first name and her last name is hyphenated (2 syllables), so we wanted a short middle name. And so, after months of discussion and listmaking, we arrived at Eleanor Jane.

Picking a name is serious stuff, or at least I think it is. I'm astounded by parents who don't put any effort into it, or who give their kids names they think are "cute" or "trendy" without any real regard for what that means for the kid several years down the road. I know of a woman named Candace Kain (Candy cane? Really?), met a girl when I was at UW named Chocolate Angel (who had to, when she introduced herself to anyone, follow her name up immediately with "and YES, that is my real name") and heard from nurses at BOTH UWMC and Children's about a child they had cared for named "Da Filthiest". I think it's laudable you're putting thought and consideration into your child's name, and as important as it is as long as you don't name it Da Filthiest I think you'll be in good shape.

Pick the name that sounds the most like you mean business. The main purpose of a middle name is to let a kid know he's in deep shit when you incorporate it.

"William Jefferson Clinton, you get in this house this minute!"

We chose original first names for both our daughters so we used their middle names to pay homage to the grandparents.

Consider pacing/meter for both first and middle name and for the entire name.

For example, our son and daughter each have two syllable first names, but our son's name has the stress on the first syllable, while our daughter's name has the stress on the second. With the stress locations, a two syllable middle name for our son works better, while a one syllable middle name of our daughter works better, at least to our ear.

Similarly, for the Eleanor Jane name below, the 3 - 1 syllable pattern works well, and a 3 - 3 syllable pattern might also work, but a 3 - 2 pattern might feel a little bit off.

With the hyphenated last name, the pacing could be difficult and maybe you'd be better off with no middle name, but you could also find something that flows nicely. Just speak out the possibilities.

If you really want to be unique, don't give your kid a middle name! lol
Seriously.
I have no middle name. It stems from some kind of tradition where (okay this is totally sexist) I was supposed to get a middle name (my original last name) when I got married. My new last name would be the last name of the guy I'm supposed to marry. Only problem: not married and probably won't. lol.

But anyway, it is surprising how the absence of a name is so uncommon!

Of course, boys in the family get middle names. Grrr...

Despite the sexism of it all, I've grown used to being middle name-less, and rather enjoy it.

A lot of times I think people go with family names for the middle, like a long dead relative or beloved grandparent or something.

I'm not really sure about what a good name would be. The only real advice (and I'm sure you know this already) is to try to steer away from names that can be made fun of easily, so your child won't be harassed in school. It probably seems silly to worry about, but really, who wants to make their own child a target?!? Bad plan.

Good luck!

Middle names aren't actually necessary. Many Europeans don't have them.

If you really want to give the child a middle name, then by all means do so, but don't feel that it's a requirement or anything.

Take your name or your baby's mama's name and use them for your inspiration. i.e. mom's name Lisa = middle name Elise. So they still have their own name and a little bit of mommy's or daddy's too!
But I think making the first and middle name sound "flowy" overrides everything else.

A) No. In fact, go for five or six.
B) The same way you choose the first, but with less pressure. So go nuts.
C) Frankly, I think President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan of Nigeria has the best name out there. So "Ebele."

If you have a common last name and have picked out a relatively common first name, please pick something unusual for your child's middle name.

As somebody who is labeled with 3 VERY common names, I run into all kinds of trouble when enrolling in large schools, checking in at the airport, calling to update my insurance, etc. My neighborhood Blockbuster frequently puts the charges of a woman with the same name onto my account, and Amazon has been known to ship my orders to somebody else with the same name (of course, it's nice when this happens in my favor - that's how I got all the seasons of Buffy for free!). Everywhere I go, it seems like there are a handful of people with the exact same name as mine.

While I have come to love my name as a grown-up, it would have been nice to have some interesting little twist. It doesn't have to be something crazy like "Moonbeam" (although I did enjoy reading that suggestion...) but can be a unique grandparent's name, a foreign name, your favorite name from literature or history (my favorite option), etc. Good luck!

My parents were/are uber Catholic (but the jesuit kind so it wasn't that bad...) so they named me "Thomas" after my father and maternal grandfather and "Joseph" because I was born on Saint Joseph's day. A couple of years later they must have been on a bit of a celtic kick as they named my brother "Brian" - the first in the family we know of... and second name "Charles" after my paternal grandfather and my father's eldest brother (also the godfather). John was born a year later and was going to be Patrick John as the folks were still going with the NY Irish thing but changed their minds at the last second and went with John Patrick for no reason they can remember or will talk about. Michael Richard came about a year and a half after that and by that time my mom was too tired to give a rip about the rest of the family and just like the name Michael. The Richard part is a mystery.

lots of traditions, but I've gone with gut feelings every time I name someone / something.

a) no. 8 is a bit much. 4 is interesting. (5 is abundance. 6 is endurance. 7 is a dare.)

b) make a short list. work together and cut it in half. repeat as necessary. also: Ask the baby for her input.

c) I'm not telling: keeping them for my own nefarious uses. Sorry. ("Nefarious" is a good one though... hmm..)

Have fun with it!!

A) yes four names is much
B) Go with something your pationet about
C) Ann, Marie, Fitzpatrick, alec, alex