Try Lynn Flewelling's Nightrunner series. Luck in the Shadows I think is the first one. The main male characters eventually develop a romantic relationship with each other which is integral throughout all the books but never the main point. Once their relationship gets going in the second book, there are some intimate scenes but the books never get sexually graphic or smutty. The books aren't perfect but are pretty well-written for the most part and she knows how to tell a good story. I got hooked on them when I was looking around for the same thing.

Neil Gaiman's books are stacked with awesome queer characters that aren't stereotypes. American gods has a gay jinn in it! and Desire of the Sandman series is intersexed, which i realise is differnt, but still pretty cool...man that series rules

"Ethan of Athos" by Lois McMaster Bujold is full of gays and a fun sci-fi read. As are many things from her Vorkosigan series. That particular book is its own thing and doesn't need any context from any of the other Vorkosigan books if I recall correctly.

Mercedes Lackey's "The Last Herald Mage" trilogy features a gay male protagonist. It's part of her sprawling Valdemar series, which includes many gay and bisexual characters. I don't know if I would call them "well-written," because it has been a while since I read them and my literary tastes have changed since then, but I loved these books to pieces when I first read them in high school.

http://www.amazon.com/Magics-Pawn-Last-Herald-Mage-Book/dp/0886773520

Colleen Doran and Wendy Pini both write gay or bi or swinging lead males into their graphic novels.

There is also a large number of manga titles that go crazy on this theme...

I am not sure if this book qualifies as fantasy but you might check An Arrow's Fligty by Mark Merlis. It is a prose retelling of the story of Achilles' son Pyrrhus and the Trojan War. It's worth checking out.

I don't know how well they meet the "well-written" criterion - that's pretty subjective, and certainly no one will mistake them for literature - but Marion Zimmer Bradley's Darkover novels feature a number of gay male characters and situations. They're enjoyable reads, for the most part, although parts are kind of dated.

So, I really don't think this is what you're looking for, but the Left Hand of Darkness has a really interesting gender/sexuality thing at the heart of it - more science fiction then fantasy. I think it's worth a read anyway.

Did you read the Lord of the Rings? Sam and Frodo never shut the fuck up about how much they love each other.

Sure, it's written in the appendix that Samwise gets married and has kids with Rosie. But you and I both know that hobbitette is a beard.

"The Front Runner" circa 1972. Don't recall the author.