What you are doing is providing work for people during a time when it is hard to find. In many cultures it is considered inappropriate not hire people to do this kind of work.

There is a cleaning service to provide every type of service level you are looking for. Some people like to have their housed straitened up and organized. Others (my husband) want someone to come into a completely clean house and sterilize the bathrooms and ceilings. Most maid services just come in and wipe things and vacuum. If you can do the basic cleaning, you may find that to be unsatisfactory.

Step one is to determine exactly what you want done. Step two is find the service that fits that need. You sound like someone who wants a crew of people to come in and deep clean. You can get a service that will arrive with heavy equipment to do deep cleaning just one time. That can be done with you present and directing just exactly what you want done.

I worked for a national chain of maid service providers for 10 days before I quit (long story). Mostly, we did surface cleaning (wipe down of fixtures, counter tops, floors, etc.), vacuuming, and windows. There was no straightening done and we weren't allowed to do much besides basic cleaning, mostly for reasons of liability--so no washing dishes or doing laundry. We were also sent out in groups of 2-3, so one could clean "wet" (bathrooms and kitchens) and the other "dry" (everywhere else in the house). Each person who worked on a home got at best 17% of what the homeowner paid for the cleaning, no matter how long it took to do the job.

If you're thinking of hiring someone to do a top-to-bottom cleaning/organizing project, you need to find a local, and probably independent, consultant who is licensed and bonded and all that because most cleaning companies won't allow employees to do that type of work.

Whatever you do, tip generously--the pay sucks.

When I say "disaster" I don't mean "It needs dusting", but "I can't find anything due to the boxes and piles of random crap that have become so overwhelming that I don't know where to begin."

If your definition of a disaster matches mine, a cleaning service is not what you need. Cleaning services are good if you are swamped or otherwise unable to keep up with regular cleaning, but the place is in pretty good shape apart from cleaning maintenance. As you imply, cleaning people can't put things away, as they don't know where they go. They will clean around them.

For a true disaster, you need someone who will sit with you and go through the crap. Some years ago, I was lucky enough to have a couple of ruthless friends who helped me with this when a lot of circumstances got me to a point where I could not cope. You can also hire an organizer, but assume that you will need to give anyone guidance about what is important to you.

Hire my wife.

I had very similar qualms when I first used a house cleaner (it was during a major exam this year and I kinda let everything go to shit). The guy I called was super nice, totally understood, and had no problem doing all kinds of weird things for me (I had him do my dishes, which I guess is unusual). He also cleaned all my floors, organized all my random papers/books/crap, and even cleaned my bathroom and my bedroom for me.

It was great, and totally worth the cost for me.

House cleaners clean your house - there is no need to feel funny about it at all!

Since most charge by the hour you may want to pick up your stuff and have them worry about dusting, mopping, vacuuming, wiping off, scrubbing, etc. I usually have someone come in once a year right before my vacation to deep clean everything. I make sure that everything that can be put away is, and then let them at it. The better services will send you a menu or check list to get a good idea of what you want to have done. Some people will work along side the cleaners, but I usually prefer to stay out of their way.

Housecleaning services scare me. Not because I think they will go through my dildos, poppers and lube mind you. But I really wonder if the companies really treat their employees all that well?

But if you can't clean your own mess up I think that says a great deal about you. Sorry.