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  9 0 What photo? I don't see any photo. As far as you're concerned the photo never existed and you never saw it. It's really no different than if you were at his or her house and made a wrong turn trying to find the bathroom and opened the bedroom door instead and saw a stack of dildos or a harness or something. None of your business. Close the door and keep walking. Fnarf answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report 2 comments by Jon and Fnarf… 2 0 It depends if they know it's up there. If someone put it up, it's more like "so and so is spreading a rumor about you". They might want to know. Personally, I would send an anonymous email to the person directing them to the photo. Avoid the awkward conversation, but still do the right thing and let them know. Jon commented about 1 year ago | Report 2 0 Hmm, except anonymous email might seem sort of like "creep is stalking me". In other words, the person might think it's from the person who put the picture up. It's a difficult question. Fnarf commented about 1 year ago | Report Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  4 0 You jack off to it. Duh. Michael Tronix answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report Comment on this answer Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  3 0 The only situation in which I might stray from Fnarf's excellent advice is if this is a good friend and you have reason to believe that they're unaware that the photo is online. I'd want to know if someone stumbled upon a nude photo of me in cyberspace. e.strange answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report 1 comment by Fnarf… 0 0 Oh, I hadn't thought of that. Tricky. Still, I think it's a tough call, because it's unlikely that you'd ever be able to get it OFF the internet, though knowing it's there might give you some clues as to whose car you're going to go out and smash up tonight! Fnarf commented about 1 year ago | Report Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  3 0 The first question is whether this person's photo is easily identifiable as them, or whether you just happen to recognize them by some physical particularity that most people (employers, casual acquaintances, etc.) would not. If they're not easily identifiable (face out of frame, for example), I'd probably leave it alone. The second question you have to answer is whether this photo is clearly there with the person's consent (ie: they posted it, it is directly accessible from their personal and regularly-maintained site, it is posted on a site for a community that you know they're a current and active participant in). If any of the above are true- if you can make a strong case that the person knows the photo's there and is fine with it, leave it alone. If you think the photo's there without consent and it's likely that the person doesn't know it's there, then yeah, let them know. Without being a jerk about it. If they are a good, close friend then I'd just mention it in person- but I'd think that you probably wouldn't have asked us if this was the case. If you don't know them intimately, anonymously notifying would be the way to go- just set up a fake email, send a short note with a link, and let the person know that you have no interest in the photo and aren't ever going to say or type another word about it. If the person already knows the photo's up but can't get it down, this is the least bothersome way of bringing up something that they're probably already pretty upset about, and if your suppositions as to who posted it are wrong you will hopefully not have offended (because your note is going to be absolutely neutral and nonjudgemental, right?). Sphinx answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report Comment on this answer Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  3 0 It depends. Do you think it was uploaded with or without their knowledge? I assume the latter, otherwise you probably wouldn't be asking the question. Ask yourself, would you want to know if it were you? "Ignorance is bliss" could apply here, but personally, I would want to know. If you want to avoid the awkward conversation, just send them an anonymous email. Jon answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report Comment on this answer Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  2 0 The wrong answer is "Facebook". Joe answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report Comment on this answer Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  1 0 I would say , in general, to quietly ignore such things (like a fart in an elevator) unless you have reason to believe that they are unaware of the picture or that they are putting themselves at some kind of risk (e.g., still in high school and/or not following general online safety guidelines, etc). Jo Langford answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report Comment on this answer Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  0 0 I think the appropriate thing is to mention in passing that you stumbled upon it... as a kindness, in case they didn't realize how very easily it could be found. Now, if you were cruising Craigs list in the personal's, the question might come up why YOU were there looking... but I think some people just don't realize how easy it is to search the internet and find references to them that they may not have made. (EX: if someone recognised or THOUGHT it was Sam Spader's photo, and stated so. Any future seach for Sam Spader would turn up their reference, and probably lead to a person look up that nude photo as well.) O my captain answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report 3 comments by O my captain, Sphinx, and O my captain… 0 2 OK, I admit, this actually happened to me. I spotted a co-worker's photo in the adult section of Craig's List, and debated whether to tell her or not. I consulted another conservative staff member, and they said, "I wouldn't say anything. These people have to learn for themselves..." I thought that was unusually insightful, so I never did mention it. Unfortunately, it wasn't nude, and it wasn't offensive, but it was suggestive, and worst of all, she had snapped the photo on her own cellphone/camera in the mirror in a women's bathroom. So how did it get posted? I suspect she put it up along with her bf/date's photo as a "couple looking".... O my captain commented about 1 year ago | Report 2 1 Am I reading you right, captain? A female coworker of yours posted a clothed and attractively posed photograph of herself on a dating/hookup page (which you yourself frequent- I have to assume from your past posts related to that self-same site and to unusual sexual practices and/or fetishes) and you took that as an opportunity to gossip about it to a mutual "conservative" coworker? It probably wouldn't have been right to say something to the coworker actually involved, but to tell another coworker whom you KNEW would disapprove because he/she is conservative? You've probably irreparably damaged the female coworker's professional standing in the eyes of the coworker you told. "Unfortunately it wasn't nude"- because that would have given you the opportunity to spread an even MORE salacious rumor? Honestly, I just don't get it. If it's okay for you to peruse a dating or sex site, what makes it okay for you to disapprove of a coworker posting on such a site? Is it because she's a woman and you're a man? Because you only look instead of actually posting? Because she made the mistake of including her face in a clothed photograph? How can you even repeat the remark "these people have to learn for themselves" with a straight face and cite it as insightful- you're one of "those people" (that use/view those kinds of sites)! A quick perusal of your asked questions reveals that you've asked MANY that are directly related to sex and which are certainly work inappropriate. Now, I'll grant that using a screen name is not quite the same as posting a photograph of yourself, but the point I am trying to make is that you really have no room to be judging your coworker's outside of work activities, and it's certainly pretty hypocritical for you to be spreading rumors about her in the work environment. I'm pretty sure OP was asking what the decent thing to do is in this situation, and you definitely didn't do it. Here's a single example of how I know you spend time on these kinds of sites: http://questionland.com/questions/18411-why-is-craigs-list-so-much-fun-to-cruise-and-peep-at-all-the-people Sphinx commented about 1 year ago | Report 0 0 Seems I hit a nerve here. While you make some REALLY good points, you've also made a lot of assumptions about my motivations. I'm not going to run through them all, cause it's obvious you've already made up your mind. I agree it would be wrong to spread rumors through the workplace. And you REALLY don't know the relationships, the age of those involved, or why it might be appropriate for me to turn to the person I did for advice. I feel I got great advice from them to drop it. And I did. Until someone else brought up the question here that had been on my mind. Last, I don't disapprove of the woman or the choice to post. The "unfortunately" was in reference to that it wasn't an exact match to the OP description of a nude photo. Sorry if that came across wrong. An attempt to be flip sounds creepy in hindsight. PS: Though I thought it looked like her, I have no proof that it really was. That's part of why I was curious. But thanks for your insight. I made me think twice about it all. And the conclusions that people draw from the questions I post. O my captain commented about 1 year ago | Report Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  0 0 A friend came across a localized porn site that featured a friend's girlfriend from when she was in "party" mode (she's since calmed down.) We didn't mention it to him or her, because her fucking business is none of ours. I'm sure it was just a one-off thing and she didn't continue, fairly little risk of disease to come from it, etc. Black Beetles in Amber answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report Comment on this answer Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  2 3 The real quandary is: do you or do you not masturbate to it? I would say no - unless you have consent and are not in a relationship (with a partner that would be upset if you told them about it). Basil answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report 7 comments by LMNOP, Bougatsa, and Basil… 1 1 That also rests highly on the quality of the photo. LMNOP commented about 1 year ago | Report 2 0 I disagree. I think it is valid masturbation material. It's not like you have to tell your partner every thought in your head. Bougatsa commented about 1 year ago | Report 1 1 I think its no biggie if its a stranger or porn or whatever, but when its an actual friend - I think it crosses a line. Basil commented about 1 year ago | Report 0 1 "I think its no biggie if its a stranger or porn or whatever, but when its an actual friend - I think it crosses a line." Oh bullshit. My fantasies are my own if they're never ever going to cross into the real world. Now, the actual possession of the photo is slightly different, so hiding that from your partner could get problematic. But, that's a different thing altogether. If undiscussed fantasies threaten you, you've got a very sad relationship. Black Beetles in Amber commented about 1 year ago | Report 1 0 It's more of a personal moral position relating solely to myself. It has nothing to do with my relationships. But way to be an ass. Basil commented about 1 year ago | Report 0 0 "It's more of a personal moral position relating solely to myself." That I respect, but you didn't preface it with that. And "partner that would be upset if you told them about it" What partner wouldn't? I don't want to/need to know what my partner's thinking about 24/7 :p Black Beetles in Amber commented 12 months ago | Report 0 0 Well, I think a lot of partners wouldn't be bothered by it in the least. I was specifically referring to poly relationships with that comment, more than anything. And so why it is a personal moral position for me: 1) no consent 2) would upset my partner It's not that it has anything to do with my partner, it is that my personal moral position takes that into account. Basil commented 12 months ago | Report Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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  0 1 Very simple here. You need to do three things, point, laugh and distribute. If they didnt want it seen they shouldn't have taken it or taken it and left it to be found. Danny answered in Sex about 1 year ago | Report Comment on this answer Enter your comment or ask a new question preview THIS IS A PREVIEW: Click "Post" to submit it or "Edit" to make changes. edit Please wait… This could take a minute if the tubes are clogged.

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