Are there "fat allies"? Should there be? for Questionland Seattle

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Are there "fat allies"? Should there be?

You know...Like queer allies. I realize these might be silly questions, but, as a "normal"-sized person who's on board (mostly) with the fat acceptance agenda, I wonder about this all the time. Google has shed no light on this topic.

It would be great if I could wear a pin that said, "Thin But Not Narrow," or something, to broadcast my feelings to the world instead of waiting for it to come up in conversation, which tends to be pretty awkward.

I realize being fat is not like being gay. I know some fat people view extra weight mostly as a medical problem, and I imagine some would probably find a "fat ally" movement more annoying than anything. But at the same time, I think the prejudice fat people suffer is far from trivial, heinously unjustified, and goes way beyond the scope of fat as a "medical problem." It makes me sad when I hear certain friends who are on the larger side make comments that imply that others, at least thinner people, find them disgusting or unattractive.

BTW, I am not a chubby chaser, although I've dated a couple of fairly large people, which may be partly why I'm sensitive to this issue.

Just wondering what people think about this.

Nim Chimpsky asked in Other Health & Fitness about 1 year ago | Report

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soundslikepuget

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I'm not aware of anybody ever using the term "Fat Ally" or there being any organized movement like this, but maybe there should be. I have a few friends who are monstrously overweight, and I've learned a lot about the day-to-day considerations they have to factor into their lives because of their girth.

One friend of mine can't fly to visit his kids in Spokane because he can't fit in an airplane seat, so he puts a LOT of miles on his car. Another person I know has to use a disabled parking permit because of bad knees caused by weight. I never would have thought of these things until friends pointed them out to me.

It's a double-edged sword though. I want to be supportive, but there's also an element of choice involved. Gastric Bypass surgery can help people lose the weight if they are monstrously obese, but the won't do it. The reason? It's in their head. A lot of fat people have intense psychological issues with their weight.

And on that note, Richard Simmons wrote a GREAT article on CNN on why it's not OK to tease fat people, because it makes their psychological problems worse. Fat = sad = eating = fatter = sadder = eating = fatter....

So, although there may not be an organized "Fat Ally" movement, the simplest thing you can do to help fat people is to not make fat jokes, and when you hear somebody make a fat joke, just say "Hey, that's not ok. You wouldn't make a gay joke, or a Jew joke, or a black joke, fat jokes are NOT ok either."

soundslikepuget answered in Other Health & Fitness about 1 year ago | Report

2 comments by keshmeshi and Nim Chimpsky…

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Fat shaming also increases shame of eating, which is just about the biggest obstacle to getting on the right track with one's diet. Many fat people pretty much won't eat in public because they can't deal with the bullshit, but eating as part of a group, with wonderful food, and friends, and wine, is an integral part of a healthy diet. Fat people who can't bring themselves to do that go home and eat a pint of ice cream in one sitting instead.

keshmeshi commented about 1 year ago | Report

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I actually still find myself lecturing people about why gay jokes are not okay (sigh). I do notice, though, that a lot of people are simply not aware of how hurtful that kind of joking can be, until it's pointed out to them. I think I'll make a point of speaking up more about fat jokes too. Thanks for your answer.

Nim Chimpsky commented 11 months ago | Report

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Just don't tell your self-conscious, slightly overweight friends or strangers walking down the street that you "want to be their fat ally".

LMNOP answered in Other Health & Fitness about 1 year ago | Report

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The nice thing about this world is that you can be whatever you want to be. If you want to be a fat ally (might want to come up with a better term for that though) then you can.

I know that they're are a lot of people out there pushing for better language, awareness, and politeness concerning issues with obesity. So you are probably not alone in wanting to be an ally.

Basil answered in Other Health & Fitness about 1 year ago | Report

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I'd say that while there are some parallels between bullying and genetics versus choice/lifestyle, it's harder to universally consider what "fat rights" should be.

As I don't have an immediate opinion on issues of personal/national health and consideration for others (for example, the ever-present airplane seating debate), I prefer to stick to my greater "don't be a dick and be as nice as possible to people" and keep my opinions set on the individual, not collective level.

Black Beetles in Amber answered in Other Health & Fitness about 1 year ago | Report

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