Like Griffin said, online play is limited to people using the same platform. Games released on Mac and Windows are the one exception to this rule, but it doesn't sound like that applies in your case.
The console makers have a lot invested in keeping their machines relatively locked down, which is probably the big reason that there's no huge push to get cross-platform online play into a viable state. Both PSN and Xbox Live are services that actively encourage people like you to pick up a second gaming rig to be able to play with your friends, which in turn becomes a cash cow for Microsoft and Sony. By the same token, these services have a lot fewer problems with cheaters/hackers, because the open nature of the PC makes it all but impossible to prevent people from running programs alongside the game. Allowing people to play with their PC-gaming friends on Xbox Live would just introduce those problems to a network that currently doesn't have to deal with them.