Great Aunt. Aren't you the sibling of your niece's mom or dad (that is, the baby's grandmother's/father's sister?)

I will speak to the possibility of how to handle it you decide to allow him to come to stay with you short term.

Make a formal agreement with him on the parameters of his stay, length of time he has there, expectations on his participation in household chores and duties and deference to your lifestyle (hours of sleep, friend visits, etc.), and what is expected of him monetarily. There should be a scheduled "family meeting" once a week (or whatever you decide) for him to report what he has done to secure work and income and move on with his life. Make it clear that you are being the supportive brother, but have no plans to have him be a long term resident. Taking him in is a stopover to another destination. All of this should be written down and formally signed. You could control his access and feeling like he is "at home" in your place by not giving him a key. He might have to wait for you to come home and be out the next day when you leave (or something like that).

If, ultimately, you feel you do have to assist him, do it for a defined short term and help him move along in life but setting it up with clear expectations on his part.

I have a relative just like her. My sympathies.
I think Kip's answer is great, but I don't think hitting bottom has a benefit for everyone. You could make one last effort to help her.
Ever watch Intervention? Hoarders? You should watch a handful of episodes of Intervention.
A good counselor will gather the people she's burned and the people who care something about her and make her face her past and her lifestyle.
My take - she's been running away from a lot and for too long. Also- she's so bossy and critical because she's hoping, daring even, someone might call her on it and set her straight - it would be a weird but dramatic way to affirm they care. (She's an actor, so she loves drama and attention - right?)
It might be too late for her to learn new tricks, but if you were to set her up with a good counselor for a self-reflective intervention situation like this, and give her the true opportunity and TOOLS to make a change in her life - then you shouldn't leave LA with any guilt -- you'll have done everything humanly possible to help her help herself.
Your life should progress in its own more- healthy manner regardless of people like this. The debt is paid, and even blood relatives are still people - if people shit on you, it's expected you scoot away. And please don't compromise and let her move up here with you.

Why this one and not three guests each have their own? Are you related? Are they a better cook? Are you paying for their produce? Are they cooking them at your house with help? 3 dishes sounds like alot to expect from one person specifically so what is the reasoning behind this person being responsible for more than the others?

Hi Lilly,

Let me preface this by saying that I feel your pain. How terrifying to have your child want to join the military.

That being said, here's my experience as a teacher of kids who went into the military and as a parent and school counselor.

The hard truth is that we can't control our kids. We can't choose who they fall in love with or what danger they put themselves in. It's incredibly painful at times and for worriers (like me) it causes anxiety.

So, one of the best things you can do for your relationship is to give him your blessing. You don't want him to resent you, and he's almost an adult so he has no obligation to listen to you, or even to have a relationship with you at all.

I don't know what your son's LD is, but the military won't take him if he can't do the work.

On the other hand, the military does provide a highly structured environment that kids with LD and ADD/ADHD thrive in. In fact, when they leave the military, they fall back into old, negative patterns. So I get his interest.

He wants to feel competent and respected. Who wouldn't?

Okay, all that being said, you can check online for other ways for him to serve his country: You can Google "Ways to serve your country" or "alternatives to the military" or www.PeaceCorps.gov

Lastly, I would say that it's important to take care of your own anxieties around his decision. You will be going through "empty nest" feelings and fear at the same time. That's a heavy dose for one person to bear alone, without some professional guidance.

Hope this helps,

Margit Crane
http://GiftedWithADD.com

Right now your interval for filming should be much shorter. You could use even a monthly schedule to capture the explosion of growth that will occur in language and physical abilities over the next couple of years and even up to the age of five. Capturing part of a meal and any other tabletop activity will serve to give you a static target with closer view to be able to see facial expression, body posture and skill of hand use. (Think of all the home movies of small children that are wildly moving around a room as the parent tries to keep them in the frame.)

So to start, how about lunchtime, so you can get the coordination of use of hands with baby foods, finger foods, later utensils. You can talk about the tastes of foods (a plate full of different fruit slices or chunks or many other things to pick up and taste). So later think about what you will have - snippets of eating baby foods in a high chair, using fingers, using a spoon, later a fork, transition to less supportive chair, sitting at the table, drinking from a sippy cup to later a small glass, etc. And the language samples, lots of stuff about color, textures, tastes, favorites, and new things. You could also film some tabletop play with stuffed animals, dolls, toy vehicles, etc.

When you get past those first few years (and eating skills are established) use a different focus for activity, like art endeavors (drawing, coloring, painting) - still a largely stay in one place activity but now you can talk about color, shape, intent and interpretation, AND you can save the artwork to keep in a scrapbook to go along with the videos. As your child ages use board games, counting out spaces, moving board pieces, excitement, disappointment (there is nothing like board games to learn how to have fun without having your ego suffer when things don't go your way), rolling dice, spinning a wheel, counting out money, manipulating cards, etc. You can always use one of these tabletop venues as a way of being at a place while you also pose one of your recurring questions or themes over time.

Ideas for questions (your original query here):

What is your favorite color?
What is your favorite food?
What is your favorite toy?
What did you learn this week?
What made you laugh hardest this week?
Tell me a dream you had last night.
What do you want to do this weekend?
What do you want for your birthday? (when time is approaching)
What should we do for Mom this weekend?
What are you good at doing (what are you best at)?
What do you want to learn how to do?
Show me you favorite book this week.
What is the hardest thing to learn in school right now?
What do you want to be when you grow up?

And, of course, the questions will have to change and grow with his intellectual abilities.

Try to have a regular setup for you camera. A shelf or wall mounted cradle or attachment point to hold it and have it be stable and pointing at the table or area you will use. That way it is not a big production to put together and it does not become the focus of what is happening for the child. It will just become a background feature that he will ignore. As for time period, turn it on and let it run until it is obvious the activity is over (it won't always be a good session). Invest in memory cards and a good large hard drive to download to and store footage. I would suggest not editing and/or playing the movies too much in front of him so it does not become performance time but instead you get a genuine look at his personality in these sessions.

Lastly, be willing to abandon the endeavor if he decides he doesn't like doing it at that time (or ever).

By the way, I think this is a pretty neat idea and hope you find some ways that work for your family to pull this off - it will be a project that you will put years into and could be a really nice documentary about the development of a mind.

I couldn't resist adding in here... Your question has several aspects to it. The other experts already gave you great info on male puberty and what to expect. The other issue you mention is sexuality, specifically, masturbation and "screwing around." First, though most guys masturbate at some point, there are some who don't - getting very reliable data on that is tough, given people's reluctance to admit it even on anonymous surveys. The important thing is being able to discuss these things with your son, as hard as that might be, or at least giving him access to reliable resources on it. Continuing to tell myths on masturbation (will make you go blind, or go crazy, or your penis will fall off, etc.) never dissuaded guys from doing it, but did create an awful lot of anguish and guilt. As far as sexual intercourse, half of guys will report not having had sex by the end of high school (depending on data source you read and your specific community/family/culture) - so you got time on that. Plenty of time to talk with your son about sexual activity, its positives and negatives, and what beliefs and expectations your family has on it. There are several resources, including classes around Puget Sound, to help families with that important discussion, too.

Here's how we roll.

Because we're Jewish, we already have to deal with the Santa issue, so there's no ducking our head in the sand for us.

We position belief as another form of diversity in our varied society.

Something like this:
"Some people believe that Jesus was the son of god and came to save us all. These folks are called Christians, and most of them believe in Heaven and Hell. Some people believe that when you die you come back in another form. This is called reincarnation and a lot of people in India and other Asian countries believe this as well as some folks in the US. Your dad and I don't claim to know what happens after you die, but we don't believe in heaven or hell. We both suspect that there isn't a god that many people think of as a man in the sky. But who knows for sure? The folks who believe in god get a lot of enrichment in their lives for it. I get a lot of enrichment from learning about the world through science. When you get older, you can make up your own mind about what you believe. "

There! Bunches and bunches of words!

I guess my main point is to both be tolerant and to model tolerance for the little ones.

But ok. It's easy for us to be this way, because we don't have any religious people in our family. Your lot is a little trickier. But I still think it's worthwhile to be honest about your atheism with your kids and wear it with pride. But you'll have more harmony amongst your relatives if you can be respectful about their beliefs all the while.

Good luck. Your situation sounds difficult to me.

Great question! The best advice (and not just for talking to little kids)is to keep it short and sweet - then repeat!

No big producations needed. Talk in the car, on a walk, at the playground, dinner time, etc. 30 seconds is all you need each day.

Read safety books together, share stories from your own childhood or play "what - if" games with your kids to make safety conversations fun and interactive with your child.

For a list of age appropriate safety books click here: http://tinyurl.com/3ls69oa

But most of all, just keep talking about safety with your kids in a calm manner. By making safety talks a part of your normal conversations, kids will feel confortable coming to you to ask questions or share concerns - even when they have made a safety mistake.

The savvyparentssafekids.com webiste also offers parents safety tips and also a downloadable copy of the "Super 10" rules for safety!

Tougo Coffee has a play area. There is a tots room at Miller Community Center. The Parent-Child Center at Seattle Central offers a great play space along with parent education which is really great. I don't think the next classes for younger infants start again until November due to usher cutbacks but you should check with them by email (do a search on Parent-Child Center Seattle Central and it should come up in the results).

There are also the MadronaMoms and capitolhillparenting Yahoo Groups where you can set up your own playground with other families in the group.

Hi "Because" This is exactly why I work with families and not just the kids. Without the parents (including stepparents) support and education and skills-building, whatever the child/teen learns or uncovers is hard to sustain. That being said, I would suggest that he do some reading (but that's hard to enforce being that he's an adult). There are several explanations for ADD/ADHD depending on who you ask. He must notice a difference in behavior though, right? Maybe it's because your daughter has been diagnosed and he thinks it's a crock. My feeling is that, regardless of the source, the behavior is a fact. I wonder if it's a marriage issue rather than a specifically ADD issue. At least the way you've described it. I offer a free 20-minute phone consult if you're interested and then (or not) we could schedule a longer session. To get routines and strengthen your parenting is important. hope this helps, Margit Crane Gifted With ADD blogging at http://margitcrane.com

Hi Misty,

How cool that you want to get your daughter excited about science! There are quite a few books out there now that have good science info, but are graphically interesting and only sneakily educational. I like The Book of Potentially Catastrophic Science and The Book of Totally Irresponsible Science. 

The Big Idea Science Book is also lots of fun to look at--lots of photos!--and has info on everything from the Big Bang Theory to frozen zoos.  And no kid would be able to resist The Most Explosive Science Book in the Universe.

For science-related fiction, I love The Secret Science Alliance and the Copycat Crook, a comic about a group of kids who develop amazing inventions and foil criminals.  It made me want to join a secret club of scientific inventors.

I hope this is helpful, and that you and your daughter have lots of fun with these.

Hayden

She's smart, she's specific, she has her routines that she doesn't want interrupted or changed, and life is all about her right now, which as you already know is common for this age. I smiled about the walking downstairs first thing because it is certainly is part of "I can do it myself", "no one has to be in front of me", and "watch me, Mommy".

With your descriptions of her communication ability and her age I wonder if it would work to have a little talk one day when things are going quite well asking her to explain in words what happened "this morning when you got upset and cried when we were..." just to see how she is able to express the event. She may be able to give you some insight into how it occurred for her. It would be interesting for you to find out what her memory of the event was, how it played out and importantly how it ended for her and how she felt at the end. Kids this age are not going to be super eloquent but it would be a good exercise for her to think about the event and hear from you that you were sorry she was so upset and wanted her to feel better but had to let her get to the end of her 'what ever you call it at home'. Tell her how much better your time together is when you are both happy and able to talk to each other and you know that you can't talk to her when she is upset.

The point you want her to internalize is how much better it is when she can "use her words" to tell you what she wants or how she feels. You may find that you are taking an apparently backward step in development by reverting to a physical comfort intervention (hug or touching her to help her calm and talk it out). That is as you see the precursor of a meltdown, NOT the tantrum itself. She might get to that point where she feels it coming and asks for a hug or whatever and you can then derail the out of control spiral to tantrum. I would love to show you a few hands on techniques for physical input that helps to organize children and calm them.

One point to understand is that the tantrum serves a couple of different purposes. Of course, it is an expression of the out-of-control over-the-top emotions of something not going the way she wanted, but somewhere in the past, I am sure, it brought out some comforting and negotiating response on your part to help her calm and feel better. Thats why I separate the window of a physical intervention above. The intervention events during the tantrum help to reinforce the repetition of this process as a usable course of action. It is not necessarily directed to 'hurt' you but could very well be orchestrated to 'recruit' you to her way of thinking and help her get exactly what she wants.

In preschool settings there is often the comforting attitude expressed (basically) "I am sorry you are upset, I don't want you to hurt yourself or others, you can stay here on this rug while you are crying, when you are done you can rejoin the group (or activity) and I will sit here with you." It is safe, it is unemotional, there is no benefit for the tantrum to continue longer than the child is internally upset, and after event passes the child returns to the group. If the activity is over that precipitated the event (the game, art time, etc.) then they rejoin in whatever is going on at that time (perhaps a missed snack is allowed as nutrition may be an important issue for the child).

I remember one child having a tantrum in my therapy room during our normal therapy session. He cried and cried (big tears) at first, at some point in the extended action, he paused - yawned a nice big yawn - and when finished returned to whining and crying. The point is, when is it expressing the upset emotion and when is it part of the show of wanting your way?

Does your daughter go to preschool, to play dates, to a sitter's house or other events where you are not there as a supervisor. How is her behavior at these times? Is she able to hold it together or does she have meltdowns in those settings? This information can help you to see how much of it is a common pattern or perhaps a behavior that is more home situation based.

I do think it would be a good idea for you to log her tantrums so that you have an idea over time how many, how long, and a word or two (or sentence) about the precipitating event when it occurred (this doesn't have to be too wordy or complicated), what was happening at that point in the day, your activities, hers. The purpose here is to see the occurrence similarities and recognize the improvement that may not be obvious to you in your own memory. It may give you some clues about what specific issues continue to be related to them over time even as improvement occurs. There will be those moments when you realize that some are due to being tired because of time of day, activities that day, etc. You may be able to see some relationship to mealtime (don't shy from the idea that some food allergies can be expressed in emotional outbursts among other odd behavioral ways), or need of food (low blood sugar events before meals). There may be patterns or information that will come out looking back over a week's log that wouldn't have otherwise come to your attention.

Your question belies the emotions you are feeling right now wanting a solution. The real situation is that you will see an improvement over time but it will not be immediate. Is there a way for you to allow your child to have her meltdown events and not internalize a gut wrench reaction? You love your child and want her to be able to control her behavior. Try to provide that benign but non-reinforcing attitude and let normal consequences occur as to your schedule or events if a tantrum interrupts the day ("we don't have time to watch the whole video now but you can see 10 minutes of it before we have to leave").

By the way, my partner in life is a Speech Language Pathologist with about three decades of experience working with preschool age and young children. I am an Occupational Therapist with early childhood experience. Your lead-in description of her speech difficulties, intervention, observations and therapist's comments were great and very helpful at having a more full picture of your daughter's abilities and situation.

Please let me know if this helps and if I can clarify anything.

I saw one once that was a single woman in the corner and about 75 cats just plastered all over the back window.

It was pretty hilarious.

I know how you feel. I have a Republican in my family and he is very smart but somehow has this "libertarian" blind spot. I have tried just about everything, but he is very well informed and can counter anything factual with ease.

So it comes down to philosophy at the end of the day and that is not unlike trying to tell someone that there religion is "wrong". It doesn't go over well at all.

It is worth continuing to point out the Republican ills when they are blatantly obvious in a kind way and just continue to plant those seeds of doubt. It's important that you don't "put it in his face" or make him defensive so he can just hear/watch the other perspective. John Stewart does a good job of amusing people while he shows how crazy they are.

Don't get him to defend anything... just keep up a slow drip of counter measures in the hope that he will see the light.

Good luck and thanks from all of us for trying.

Surely the acronym SNAFU was invented by parents first and not the military. Your sitation is both all fucked up and totally normal.

Friends of ours gave us some fisher-price "aquarium" crib toy that turned out to be made of some kind of baby crack. Totally irresistable to our boy and helped keep him happy in his crib.

As the previous poster said, your kid is actually doing fine and that sleep pattern is normal.

I do not dig the self-pacification shit for infants myself and we always got up to get our kid when he cried. But our kid was a good sleeper after 6-7 months so I may have just been lucky. I alos don't blame any parent for doig whatever it takes to get over that hump.

Self pacification for toddlers is a different story. I'm all about that.

We just went through this same thing and found something "safe" enough to buy for our toddler. Fred Meyer (in Ballard) carries Play Sand from Mutual Materials, a local company. So we called them. They were VERY helpful and looked up the MSDS on their products. Theirs is a natural product - river bed sand. Also he said the silica of respirable size is less than .051% by weight. I forget what he said was the acceptable threshold, but this is way low for silica exposure. He also told us that if we wanted to go with a larger grain sand, since the concern is really with the dustiness of the sand, their Design Mix Paver Joining Sand is the least dusty of all their products. This is different than their paver joining sand sold at the big box stores, so you have to buy it from a Mutual Materials location - Bellevue, Redmond, Kent, Mukilteo, etc. This product is also washed, etc, so it's a fine substitute. Deciding to err on the safer side of things, we drove out to get a bag (80 lbs for around $6) of the Design Mix Paver Joining Sand. We haven't opened it up yet to see the exact size of the bits. I'm sure this sand won't adhere as well for making sand castles, etc. but I'm pretty sure my son just wants to dump it all over right now anyway, so that's not my concern. But I do feel the Mutual Materials Play Sand we saw at Fred Meyer is a fine option and if it does seem dusty at all, I read elsewhere where people suggested just keeping it a tad damp. Hope that helps!

I don't have a daughter, but I am a woman who was once a girl with her first period...so...

I wouldn't make a big huge ceremonial thing out of it, but I do think it would be cool if you take a little time to just have a girls' day together. Go out and do something that's fun for you guys, or if she isn't feeling well, get something delicious delivered and pop in a movie. If it seems like she's not super-embarrassed or uncomfortable talking about it, you could share one of your silly "I got my period at the worst time ever" stories, because lord knows we've all got them. Give her an opportunity to ask about menstruation, development, sex, or whatever else is on her mind and be willing to answer in a way that you feel is appropriate, but don't act like she has to talk about any of those things right at that moment. Let her be in charge of the conversation.

Keep in mind she might be really physically uncomfortable (My periods, for the first 7 or 8 years, involved unbelievably heavy flow, intense cramping, nausea/vomiting, chills and flushes along with shivering and a bright red face, and occasional lightheadedness.). She may just need a cool washcloth on her face, 2 advil, lots of fluids, and permission to stay home from school and lay on the couch. I hope not, though.

Something you can definitely do for her is go out and buy her quite a few options for "feminine hygiene"- pads, liners, two types of tampons and maybe even a box of Insteads. Keep in mind that she might not be able to handle a tampon and be willing to explain/advise, but don't pressure her about figuring it out if she can't make it work right away. When you think she's probably getting close to menarche, I'd make sure that she has access to all of these things no matter where she is (maybe get her a little zippered bag she can keep liners/pads and tampons in for her backpack or purse)- one of my best friends got her first period at her dad's house (parents were divorced) and had to go tell him, extremely embarrassed, and then go to the grocery store with him and make the choice about what she needed with zero female guidance. It sucked. It would have been much better had her mom taken the time to prepare her.

And finally, if it isn't just the two of you in the house, make sure that you don't embarrass your daughter by trumpeting or hinting about the news that she's growing up. It's her own private business, even if that means that she doesn't even want to talk about it with you.

Does he like to read? In that case I'd suggest books (because that was my favorite present as a kid). Susan's Cooper's the Dark is Rising series can often be bought in a single volume or as a boxed set and the main characters are all round his age. Philip Pullman's Dark Materials series, The Hobbit, and U.K. Leguin's Wizard of Earthsea cycle are all great books and would probably appeal to him. If he's more of a creative type I'm a big proponent of toys that'll nourish that creativity- a really neat set of markers (grown-up looking ones, like the awesome box set of pen-size markers Pentel makes), a lego set he can use to build whatever he pleases, or a different building set like K'nex (sp?) might be fun for him. When buying gifts, though, you've got to know your target audience- some kids his age would be delighted with a new book while others would think "Oh, a book...great?", some are still super-interested in "toys" while others think they're too old for toys and would rather have sports equipment or a video game for their new system. I was still really into imaginative play as a "tween", but many kids the same age today feel like they're past that. If he's more interested in looking and feeling adult he might think music (a cd or maybe a gift card for itunes) is cool.

I find some good things at Lands End i i find good reasonable kids clothes at Lands End and LL Bean kids. They have great return policies also.
For uber cute stuff I like tea collection and mini boden.

You are doing a great job fielding these questions and using just about the only tactic available to you in this circumstance - defer to the parents, define terms when appropriate and move along with your job - tutoring.

I think that no matter what their age, you should defer to their parents. It is not your role to be their sex educator in any way, shape or form. No brief answers, descriptions, tips, websites, phone number for Planned Parenthood, etc.

NOT. YOUR. JOB.

Just be straight up about it and tell them that you'd love to answer their question, but it's not appropriate for you to talk to them about sex. Defer to their parents, or ask if they have another trustworthy adult in their life they can confide in (school counselor, family friend, etc.).

As for the personal questions, tell that kiddo that you feel uncomfortable talking about your personal boyfriend business with her and move along to math or whatever. Be kind and calm about it.

The kid with the babysitter TV and foul mouth? This is more complicated. I'd pull him aside ASAP and tell him that it's not okay to use that kind of language at Kumon - it's like being at school - same rules apply.

Tell his parents that his language concerns you, it seems a bit advanced for his age. Let them know that you've told him to knock it off, and ask them to reinforce this. You can have your boss do this on your behalf.

Finally, document his language and the conversation you had with him and the parents.

Did you get that, people who work with kids? DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT. This will protect you if things go sideways, and the child if he needs further help.

Finally, finally, if a child EVER tells you they are being sexually abused believe them. False reporting is extremely rare - 2% of the time only.

I'm tired of typing and must go off and teach, but I have tons more info about sexual behavior in children if you want to email me directly. amy@birdsandbeesandkids.com

I think I have the key for your cloth diapering needs - Green Mountain Diapers:

http://www.greenmountaindiapers.com/

There is an info page "new to Cloth"

http://www.greenmountaindiapers.com/newmom.htm

(although I take umbrage at the "newmom" in the URL as I'm a dad who happens to be preoccupied with cloth diapers; am I the only one out there?)

You can get a ton of info from their website, even if you don't buy them there (although we did).

Prefolds (basically a square piece of cotton that is thicker down the middle) are the cheapest option, and they have worked great for us for 8 months. They are the simplest, and probably what you wore (Things start getting expensive when you go for the latest technology - "fitteds" and "pockets", which I only have a theoretical knowledge of). As far as I can tell, the only drawback to the prefolds is that they are somewhat more bulky and require two steps - diaper, and then cover.

We basically bought 36 cotton prefolds in each size, starting with the orange-trimmed newborn size (now we are on the red mediums, at month 8). and used about 4 diaper covers (NB, Small, then medium) at a time. We splurged on the organic cotton prefolds, so it came out to about $2.50 per diaper. Non-organic is more like $2. The covers are about $12 each, and you can just rinse them if they get pee on them, and re-use.

My only other tip is about detergent - you want a clean-rinsing detergent, because otherwise the diapers will develop buildup of soaps - they will become less absorbent and will start stinking of vinegar.

Anyway, check out the Green Mountain site for infinitely more details.

A service, as someone else mentioned, is another option if the price works for you. One person I know tried a service, but quit because she found that she was doing a ton of laundry anyway so she figured she might as well just wash the diapers too.

I'd get him a book about puberty - The Boy's Body Book is great. And let him read up on it and decide for himself.

Shaving is the least of your worries...

I do, she was ugly as hell and her name was Airabella or something terrible like that, but she had a kick ass cowgirl outfit.
Do you remember the preemie cabbage patch dolls?? Their head smelled like heaven! What was that smell? It wasnt quite baby powder, it was almost like the smell of cake batter.

I think this is something you don't need to bring up until A) you know that your daughter has heard explicit references to prostitution through media or social interactions OR B) she asks you, whichever comes first. Honestly, though, I think you've at least 3-4 years before you need to broach this topic, and when you do, you'll be well prepared because you've already had "the talk" with your daughter about sex.

All that needs to be said at first is that some people pay other people money to engage in sexual activities, for a variety of reasons. Any more discussion about your own moral feelings about it, legal issues, etc. should be guided by the way the conversation is already going, and can be tailored to your daughter's age. For example, you might say that people who engage in prostitution (as customers or purveyors) are often at risk of sexually transmitted diseases, that prostitution is illegal for a lot of different reasons in our society (it can be dangerous, many of the people working as prostitutes have few other choices, there is an association of violence and drug use with prostitution, we live in a fairy misogynistic and sex-negative society, some people think that having sex outside of marriage or a loving relationship is wrong, etc...), and also bring up your own beliefs about the moral and societal implications of sex work, whatever they may be. But if the topic comes up when she's ten, I'd keep the conversation fairly simple and let her level of interest, confusion, or emotional response guide how deeply you discuss it.

Sounds like myself at that age, somewhat.

If that's the case, leaving books for him is absolutely the best thing you can do. He may realize that he can get even more information from the library, but it's embarrassing to talk to a parent about latent sexuality so don't pick him too hard for questions, just say what you have to say and he'll listen.

Nope.

I frequently look at babies and hate their parents, though!

Chiming in with another "Yes they 'can'. No they shouldn't. Ever"
Stupid evil corporations don't care what is actually good for babies - they care about making profits. Period. Remember: Fred Flintstone was selling kids Winston cigarettes.

Babies/youngin's shouldn't have soda pop at all. Nor juice for that matter. Nutritionally, they NEED neither. Yes, even fresh squeezed juice. I've asked.

Also: The carbonated gas can complicate their already-hard-to-bear gas issues. More and more docs are seeing gas as the cause of baby colick.

Emily's spot on: breastmilk FTW!

I called on my favorite breastfeeding expert Renee Beebe, M. Ed., IBCLC, a highly respected Seattle-area lactation consultant, and here is her take on your feeding dilemma:

"It's really terrific that you have been exclusively breastfeeding your daughter! It can be challenging to transition back to the workplace, so it's great that you are being thoughtful about helping your baby learn about another way to receive your milk.

It is normal for a 3 month old baby to initially refuse a bottle. It is a foreign object to her. Why should she suck on a silicone nipple? Let me assure you that even if she had been given a bottle every day since she was born, she may still refuse at about 3 months.

This is the age when babies can start taking more control of their world! My best advice to you is to take it slowly, make it fun, be creative, and give her control. Babies are naturally curious and use their mouths to explore. If she sees the bottle as just another play -thing that is in her world, she will be more accepting.

Try other liquids. Make it surprising, novel and interesting. I sometimes use water or very diluted apple juice when introducing a bottle. Or use breast milk—but very cold. Some babies will only take a bottle if they are distracted with TV, toys or going for a walk.

Try making the bottle very UNlike the breast, and you may be more successful. Who says she has to drink from a bottle anyway? Many babies do very well with a cup—sippy or otherwise. Best of luck!"

I've seen Renee's advice work time after time in my own clients.

Learn more about breastfeeding, check out Renee's Breastfeeding Between the Lines at The Second 9 Months. 

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