That video. Whoa.

I've definitely seen people using the foam roller at the gym - men and women - and never once thought of it as sexual. Pretty sure that the standard pelvic thrust exercise is waaaaaay more sexual.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hDAVQcreQ6g

I never would have thought of this, unless you had shared the link with us. Now that you've planted the seed in my mind, I watched the whole video with an eye to provocative moves, and think a lot has to do with the intent, surroundings and if more than one is doing it in a class.

I understand your reluctance to "put on a show" if you're the only one, however, I think you could modify your routine to avoid those exercises that you think might appear "suggestive"... for lack of a better word.

Can you ask the clerk at the gym what their policy is, and share why you're concerned. I imagine they'd appreciate your candor and give you helpful feedback if they allowed it.

Not at all.

Not at all.

...

What gym, and what time?

I have only registered so that I can comment on this to be honest and it took me ages to type so please read it.

I have smoked for 20 years and have wanted to stop for about 15 of those years, but it was always going to happen 'tomorrow' or next week or next month...anytime that meant not now.

Six months ago I realised that I was boring myself with my same old
'Right! I'm stopping tomorrow'
I knew that as the words were coming out of my mouth my brain was saying 'yeah yeah alright, stopping again are we??'
and that I wouldn't actually stop.
It was just a cycle of kidding myself.

I think the reason for constantly wanting to stop and not actually having the courage to achieve it were because of several fears and subconciously telling myself the following without actually realising it;

Will I actually be able to stop?
What will I do with my time?
How could I get through the cravings without killing everything in my path?

Six months ago I decided that I REALLY DID want to stop, not because I should but because I wanted to and I knew it would be one of the most challenging situations I would ever have to deal with voluntarily.
I also run a business which is stressful enough so the odds were stacking up against me before i had even started.

Some people are really strong willed , some weak or whatever; everyone is different and only you know what will work for you. I am the type that if I fully understand the theory and process then my brain can accept what is going to happen and I am more likely to succeed.

Soooo for the next five months leading up to the quit date I began reading up (whilst I was still smoking) on methods and techniques on how to go about it.
I figured that replacement therapy i.e. patches etc. were just going to annoy me and prolong the agony so after 5 months of research I was really and TRULY READY to go cold turkey for the first time in 20 years to beat this bastard that was chipping away at my lifespan, my bank balance, my everything really.
Afterall it was only 5 months of reading and convincing myself...I had already smoked for 240 months so what was afew months preparation.

I decided to stop on Sunday 4th of February 2012 (no reason, just a random date) so on the Saturday night I smoked my last. As I smoked the last one I was telling myself this is it, I got a bit sad as the fear speech started kicking in that I was describing above but I just did my best to dismiss it.

I have been a non smoker now (ooooh!! get me :o)) for 4 weeks tonight. I want to list what you actually go through emotionally and physically as there is only a half story online and in books. I'm not sure if anyone has been totally honest about what you go through.

THE BIG DAY
Soooo after quitting on the Saturday I went to bed.
I went to work on the Sunday feeling great with a big smile on my face as though i had already achieved something, telling myself i just need to get through today. This all changed when i got home though. I got home and couldn't sit down because if I did then i knew I would pick up the laptop and need to smoke through routine / habit.

It was absolutely awful, I was just crying. I tell you what it was like, it felt as though a good friend or favourite relative had died - honestly! It's the strangest feeling looking back now, I was walking around my house with my arms constantly folded, my back leaning from wall to wall. It was absolute torture.

I had a headache for about 8 hours by now and was really pissed off with tears trickling down my cheeks. I was prepared, thinking that I wouldn't be able to sleep so i had bought these herbal sleeping tablets and thought, man I can't handle another minute without a smoke. I took one herbal nytol to get to sleep. I never take anything like that but i had to break the thought loop.

The nicotine withdrawal makes you a cigarette obsessed monster. Nothing else matters, even if your life didn't revolve around smoking before you quit IT DOES as soon as you attempt to stop.

Anyone that says it wasn't difficult after a few days, in my opinion, is talking nonsense.

After the first week the actual nicotine has left your body so that's not the problem, the biggest battle is with the Angel / Devil on your shoulder scenario.

Keep this in mind.
It isn't the nicotine that's the problem.
It's a psychological addiction

The first four or five days after quitting for me, involved going to work and running my business for 10-12 hrs a day, trying not to speak to anyone if i could possibly avoid it (for their own safety).
Coming home having a shower and going to bed after about an hour. I was soooo bored. Bored of thinking of nothing else but smoking. Bored of thinking 'shit am I going mental' Can I do this? Am I strong enough?
The devil on my shoulder saying...
- Well if you just had one then you'd feel better!
- Only having one is still better than smoking full time...isn't it?'
- It doesn't make you a smoker having one day does it?
- You could just have one to prove that you don't like it?

It took a while to realise that this was my mind playing tricks on me. You have no idea how much of a mental grip this shit has on your brain until you try to deprive yourself of it. Your mind will tell you anything just to get you to do what it wants. Like some manipulative ex partner filling your head with any old crap until you agree...convincing you that it's the right thing to do.

I knew that if I had one I would be right back on it, ,there is no half way with smoking.
You smoke or you dont. It's that simple, if you want to quit don't have even one.

You really need help from people around you.
Ask them not to smoke around you as it is torture for a few weeks.
If you have a 'friend' that keeps offering you 'just one' and won't take no for an answer take the cigarette they are offering and snap it in front of them, they will soon stop finding it funny or they will suddenly 'remeber' to stop asking you.
Sounds harsh but tough shit they are just trying to throw you off track as they can't msuster up the will power to stop.

Here is a list of some of the side effects of going cold turkey i felt.

WEEK ONE;
I honestly felt low, like someone had died.
Shortest fuse you have ever had.
Every single thing is irritating.Trying to align a screwcap on a bottle could literally send you over the edge or make you cry your eyes out, even if you're not the emotional type, you actually become someone that you are not for a while.It's nuts.

Nose gets a bit sniffy.

Started coughing, well, more the clearing your throat before a speech type of cough
(this is involuntary which also becomes really annoying :o) surprise surprise)

Feeling really tired all of the time.
This is because nicotine is a stimulant, so your body is starting to regulate itself. This eases after a few weeks.

Waking really early but this is because you are going to bed early.
(one bonus of this was, usually when my alarm went off i would snooze it 10 times before i got up but now it's one beep and my eyes are open).

WEEK TWO;
All of the above but just to make sure you feel worse it throws another few symptoms at you.

My airwaves started to feel as though they were constricting and i actually was gasping for air which pissed me off as I thought I would be so full of energy that i would be tap dancing out of the door by now and doing star jumps waiting for the kettle to boil rather than wheezing trying to catch a breath.but no.
(this turns out to be because the cilia / lung hairs that catch impurities and tell your brain to cough in your lungs are beginning to regrow and as they are clearing out your lungs with the crap they are clearing out blocking your small airwaves making it difficult to get a breath).
I tried to turn this in to a positive and thought well if I don't continue this journey this horrible gasping for air feeling will be a permanent thing in years to come. Afterall, I had just been through a week of absolute hell there was no way it was going to be for nothing.

I started to get intense night sweats (never had these before before)
I won't do a mega list and bore you to death but imagine a flu flooring you.
As your body detoxifies and gets rid of the poison this is probably the best way to describe it.

Constipation (nice topic i know)
As smoking has a kind of laxative effect, your system becomes lazy. When you stop smoking it is like it has forgotten how to think for itself as it has been prompted for so long, so you start to get really bloated. Make sure you eat loads of veg.

I had read that I should be drinking loads of fluids, so i was having about 4 litres a day as this is meant to help flush out all the toxins.
Yeah yeah yeah, all your body does is stores this too. So even though i am female 5'7" and weigh app. 135lbs i felt as if i weighed 1350lbs.

WEEK 3 until now;
My throat is killing me, really tender and my voice was going hoarse.
This is because your throat starts to repair and renew, your throat becomes tender like teething baby gums.
I'm not once of these melodramatic people, I rarely get ill and if i do i just work through and dismiss it as an inconvenience.

I started to get itchy / tingly arms sometimes which was weird. Not all the time but a wee bit like a spider running up your arms.
I have since found out that that was my circulation starting to get better.

I had to eventually give in and go to see a Doctor on Wednesday (3 days ago) as I have completely lost my voice for a week, alongwith all of the fatigue etc.
I was diagnosed with Chronic Laryngitis.
I still have no voice and still feel rough as.
They reckon this could be for another 3 weeks.
It just shows you though. I have have had maybe three colds in my adult life and have felt like death for about 24 days so there must be some amout of crap to get rid of.
The body is quite an amazing machine really.

I reckon if I have one cigarette all these bad side effects would go away but is that the Devil on my shoulder speaking or fact
... I'd guess at the Devil.

The bottom line is I have gone through 28 days cold turkey, which has astounded me.
I was the procrastination Queen and managed it through being prepared.

THINGS TO REMEMBER

- Be sure you know why you want to stop

- Get a plan together to stop, arm yourself with knowledge

- Stopping smoking will affect the rest of your life, it's worth doing properly

- It's only the first few days that are a total ball buster, nicotine wise, the rest is all up here.

- If you need to use herbal sleep aid for three nights to get over the 'fking insanity' of cravings - then just do it.

- It's all about keeping busy and breaking your routine. If you smoke when you drink tea or coffee, maybe try switching to fruit juice or milk or whatever to break the association in your brain.

- Just don't swap one addiction for another and drink too much. Again, you might need to quit booze for a week or so to break the link of smoking when you drink. This sounds harsh but remember it's only short term to make it easier for you in the long run.

- Keep your hands busy by twiddling a pen or a coin. Chew gum or a carrot, sounds nuts but stops YOU going nuts.
- Don't worry if you gain a few Lbs / Kg this isn't fatal but smoking is. Deal with one thing at a time.

- Most importantly - don't think too far ahead.
It really helps to concentrate on this minute, this hour, this day rather than too far ahead

- try not to worry how you are going to live without cigarettes for the rest of your life.
Your goal is to get through this day without cigarettes - tomorrow comes soon enough except it's a wee bit easier than the day before!

For all the hard work that it has been, I have actually done it, which means anyone can do it. You don't have to go cold turkey, if you use replacement therapy then so what.
Just stop somehow.
You don't really realise how smoking controls you, until you stop.

I hope I haven't bored you to death. I'm just thrilled that after all of my promises to myself I have lasted 28 days. I am strong now and still have thoughts popping in, I think any smoker that gives up may never, ever escape the urge to smoke but the feelings just become weaker but a 20 year habit is hard to break, but I'm well on my way!
Ha, I am getting a bit emotional even thinking about it because I am so proud of myself as i thought i never could.
(I think I have used a lifetimes supply of tears just these past 4 weeks)

People that don't smoke have no idea how much of a psychological rollercoaster it is.

Good luck to anyone that is about to or is currently trying you CAN do it and I really mean that.

yukka_plant@yahoo.co.uk

Yes I do. But not in Seattle so no worries there. Membership is 45$ a month but dropped down to 37$ if you go 8 times or more but only because I work for the hospital that runs the gym. Starting up cost me 100$.

I'm locked in for 12 months and I can only leave if I move and I have to pay for that. I've never heard of upgrade fees or anything like that so no. But I can only compare it the Y which I think I liked better.

I didn't know that gyms were gutter nature but I can believe it.

I usually tip 20%. I only see a massuse a few times a year ( our of pocket as well) for deep tissue massage when I've really messed something up. Its definetly not relaxing massage, some of it just plain hurts but i feel sooooo much better a day or two later. While it is a healthcare expense it is also a service, and when you're lucky enough to find someone good it makes sense to me to tip. Anytime someone is using their hands that much it's a nice thank you ( I honestly don't know how people can do that all day without getting arthritis)

You could bring up this subject next time you go in and see what they say. If all they do is therepudic they may have a different take on it than someone who does both. If they know your situation they probably will give you their honest opinion on the matter. I think they would also take in consideration the frequency of your visits ( if you're going once a week they may be more willing to consider it less of an issue than if you're going every few months).

You are properly compensating your licensed massage practitioner through the fee structure that is charged in this medically based setting. Your relationship with them does not require you to give an additional tip for services rendered.

Your appreciation of their professional skill can be expressed by you recommending them to other potential patients. Your own words, directly delivered, as of how much they are helping you is very appropriate.

By the way, in Washington State the title is "Licensed Massage Practitioner", using the initials "LMP". The term "massage therapist" can be used, as long as the term 'licensed' is not used along with it.

I joined the Y, and its somewhere in the range of 30 per month. the downtown one is nice, though the branches tend to be a little smaller, and only open until 9pm.

still, it feels good to be supporting the Y

24 hour fitness

Plan, but can cancel at any time

No upgrade fees

$30 a month, but it varies. They have different sizes of clubs. You can also get memberships for multiple locations (near work and near home).

The equipment is standard where I go. It's large, and has a lot of variety. There's a 3-lane pool.

Best part is that its open 24 hours, so if you have a late day you can always go there. Workout and watch sports on the big screen tvs.

I think that if you are the kind of person who consistently engages in negativity towards yourself or others in a way the obstructs solving problems, then trying to restructure your narrative about a situation might be a good thing to do.

There is, however, a recent trend in our society where we are essentially being sold a concept based on "magical thinking"- basically, that we can cause concrete changes in the material world simply by how we approach our lives mentally and emotionally (this is the premise of books like "The Secret"). I think that this is actually a really harmful concept. For example, people with critical or chronic illness are often treated as though their illnesses are actually being caused by their own negativity, or that their physical condition would somehow magically improve if they were incredibly upbeat and positive about their situation. This is incredibly disturbing to me- essentially, this script suggests that if you are having problems, you should turn a blind eye to what actually ought to change, you should keep any and all negative emotions (grief, sadness, anger, frustration) about such problems to yourself and actually deny that you are experiencing them, and you should feel guilty about having any negative feelings about negative life events. I find this script incredibly isolating and blaming.

Apart from the issues I see with the whole "positivity" trend, I find that criticism and negativity have their place in identifying issues and problems, acknowledging them, and seeking out real, concrete approaches that might solve or ameliorate these issues. It is not helpful to simply be certain that "things will sort themselves out" or that "it'll all be for the best" when there are real injustices, real sufferings, and real problems to be approached. However, if you find yourself engaging in a consistent negative script (even in situations that really don't warrant it) that doesn't lead you toward action but rather just discourages you, attempting to "retrain your brain" (as Kristen suggests) may be useful to you.

I could see that that would be shocking. As usual, I recommend getting help from a team, because often one persons view is a bit limited. I haven't heard of anything about groups, but I will keep an eye out. You might check the NAMI website as well. Forming a group sounds like a great idea, if you can talk about what's going on for you and share some of the stuff that works for you it will be great for you and others who might be feeling isolated. The creative angle you are thinking of is probably something that would be awesome as well. I imagine most of us would be surprised to know how many of us experience symptoms of mental illness. Glad to hear your experience is nudging you in a creative direction.

I had a bad experience with anti-depressants so I always try to warn people about taking them. For me I ended up feeling much worse and I experienced severe withdrawals while trying to get off them.

A have a few problems with these drugs. First, there really is no way to measure the effectiveness of them directly. You can't measure serotonin before and after taking the drugs to see if there really is an improvement. Also, for many of the drugs the way they work really isn't understood. That doesn't give me a lot of confidence. When I wasn't feeling better the doctors just kept increasing the dosage and adding other drugs.

I have read some studies that state that 54% of people feel better after taking these drugs. That isn't a very good success rate. Placebos work around 44% of the time. I would rather take the placebo (or not take anything) than deal with the side effects and withdrawal.

The side effects for me were exhaustion, weight gain, sexual dysfunction and constant thirst. I'm not sure how I am supposed to feel better while experiencing all of that. Plus I couldn't concentrate at all.

It sounds like a lot of people here have had good experiences, and that is great. I just want to state that I know a lot of people that have had bad experiences. Even though I am still depressed I would never take any of these drugs again.

Samarya Center in the Central District is absolutely fantastic. I took a 6 week course last year with RW who is "plus" sized and such an ass kicker. By far my favorite instructor and yoga studio.

Hi Dolly,
When we dream of something or someone invading our home, it can have to do with feeling like our boundaries have been crossed. If I were working with you personally on this dream, I would ask you what your associations are with snakes and cats. Since I cannot ask you direct questions (though feel free to respond to this post), I can take an archetypal approach. Looking at it in a universal way, snakes COULD represent male sexuality, and a cat COULD represent feminine sexuality. This would make me curious if there were something going on w/your boyfriend (or someone else) where you might be feeling a bit ‘invaded’ (i.e. the home invasion by the ‘snake’) and/or hurt or criticized by him or someone else (the snake biting the cat). The word 'snake' can have a double meaning too, like when we call someone a snake it implies they are not trustworthy.
You might also want to think back if there is something someone has done possibly 3 times to 'hurt'or 'attack' you (emotionally, not necesarily physically) since the snake bit the cat 3 times.

In the next dream, the presence of so many bugs could indicate that something (perhaps this same situation) is ‘bugging’ you. Dreams love puns and plays on words, so again w/out consulting with you, this would be a generalization that may or may not apply. In the dream you ‘tip toe out, with fear'. So ask yourself, do you feel like you have to ‘tip toe’ around something (or someone) in a fearful way? And once you make it through that, the lobster claws at you. This seems to be an echo of the snake biting the cat, and also of escaping the bugs.

The good news is that in all of these situation you (and the cat?) seem to come out ok. The fact that you woke up scared indicates that these dreams are trying to get your attention about some matter in your life. Think if there is someone (or something) that is causing you to feel scared. like I said without talking to you directly I am only tossing around ideas…you will know what resonates with you. Feel free to reply here if you’d like, or if you prefer you can email me privately at: mimi@thedreamdetective.com

One last thing: Since this is a recurring dream and these 2 happened a week apart, see if you can notice a connection between what was going on the day(s) before these dreams, and if you can connect the dots. For example, if one (or both) of the dreams happened on a Wednesday night, what did you do on that Wednesday?

I hope this helps and thanks for sharing your dream,
Mimi

How We Decide by Jonah Lehrer gives a nice overview of the neuroscience behind how we make decisions, both good and bad. He also wrote a rather good article about self-control for The New Yorker a few years back, in which he concludes that the ability to distract yourself, or to shift your attention away from temptation, is the key to avoiding it. He argues that this ability may be genetic, but that it can also be learned. For issues re: bad romance, I'd recommend Love and Addiction by Stanton Peele. His books and articles about substance abuse are good too, although I think he's a bit too hard on twelve step groups.

Personally, I've found that the best way to avoid drinking too much is to avoid alcohol altogether. Controlling your diet is a bit harder of course, because you can't simply stop eating. What I do is keep track of approximately how many calories I eat during the day, and set a daily limit. I also weigh myself at least once a week to make sure I'm not gaining weight. The downside to this approach is that some people get bored with the whole thing and just give up. I just kept at it until it became a habit, like brushing my teeth or taking out the garbage.

HealOnCapHill has some good advice for specific things you can do, and you should definitely take his advice.

I just want to add that one of the hallmarks of people with the best self-control is that they use it the least. People with great self-control build their lives in such a way that temptation isn't in their face all the time.

We all have a finite amount of self control, it's like a bank account. On any given day, you have a set amount of times you can use your self-control, so the trick is to design a lifestyle that requires you to use it the least.

If you eat too many donuts and are trying to cut back, but you walk by a donut shop on the way to work each day, change your route. If you are trying to cut back on drinking, don't keep beer in the fridge. On nights that you decide to drink, buy a 6 pack, not a case.

If you need to get exercise, but often give up and quit, try this trick. Hop on the bus without any money. Well, just enough money to pay to get on the bus. Ride the bus for a couple miles, and hop off, and walk home. If you put yourself in a situation where you can't quit and take a cab or bus back, you'll force yourself to finish the walk and get the exercise.

Designing your life so that you have to exercise your self-control as little as possible is the best way to improve your self-control. The less you have to use it, the stronger it is when you need it.

This was basically the thesis of this book: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0052REQCY/ref=kinw_myk_ro_title . I heard about it on NPR and bought it on my kindle, but didn't finish it because the whole point of the book is what I just explained in those few examples.

Bottom line: you can do it. Just design your life so you only have to say "no" a few times a day. That way, your willpower to say "no" will be strong enough to make it.

I'm coming from a slightly different place, I'm bipolar type II, but my doctor absolutely cracks the whip as far as my sleep schedule goes. He says that it's essential as far a maintaining mental health. I do my best to go to bed at the same time every night. And, no matter what, ABSOLUTELY NO NAPPING DURING THE DAY. When I sometimes slip and fall into a schedule like yours I have to get myself to set my alarm and get up no matter how tired I am. You're only miserable for the first day or two and then you're naturally falling asleep earlier.

I believe that some have suggested a light box. I didn't have any luck with it, but it does seem to work for some. What I wanted to mention about that is before investing in one I was able to rent one by the month through the hospital that my doctor was affiliated with. You may want to find out if that's a possibility for you.

The most important thing I wanted to say is that if my doctor is correct, and he does seem to know what he's doing, then your current sleep schedule is not your body doing what it seems to want to do and this may be contributing to your mood disorder.

I wouldn't worry about the sleep hours if you are getting decent sleep. But for the seasonal depression, a half hour or more spent in daylight (I go for long walks to achieve this) will work wonders. Even on cloudy days.

Auditory hallucinations can be common in schizophrenia. She is probably experiencing them.

It took me about 12 years to get straightened out enough to take my meds, and quite frankly, I am lucky I survived all the shit I did to make it to that point. Schizophrenia is particularly dangerous, because people are mostly out of their minds during the psychotic episodes.

I kind of doubt that she will be able to accept her mental illness and realize that she has it until she is stabilized on medications. The only thing that worked for me was getting the injection form of antipsychotic medication, because I couldn't NOT take it. Once I was on the injection of Haldol I improved quite quickly.

There are a lot of different depot (injection) forms of many antipsychotics. If risperdal makes her shake, then she should try something else. There are options out there. I'm a big believer in the injection form, because they are easy to take and they last like 3-4 weeks...enough time to take a lot of the crazy away.

I still have to take other meds to deal with all the other crap and to function like a semi-normal human, but the injection, for me, was really like the first brick in the wall to come down.

I'm a big fan of winter hibernation. If it's not causing a problem and you are feeling rested, don't worry about it. If you want some help with the overthinking, mindfulness practices have a lot of other benefits as well. I like to practice tai chi and chi kung before bed, I find it helps me shift down into relaxation mode. Lot's of people have similar benefits with yoga as well.

I think you shouldn't try to force yourself to wake by a certain time, but it sounds like you're not enjoying falling asleep. I've had sleeping problems my entire life; often I can't fall asleep until early morning (like 4 or 5am) because I can't stop thinking or worrying - then I'll sleep really late and miss appointments, be late for class or work, etc. It's always worse this time of year. Even though I'm only sleeping 8 hours and it feels like I'm letting my body do what it wants to, I do notice that I feel better - mentally and physically - when I am on a more "normal" sleep pattern.

Some things that help me:

I have a lamp with fairly bright bulbs attached to a dawn simulator alarm clock - it has a sound alarm too but I don't use it. It gradually brightens my bedroom in the morning, and can also be used to gradually dim at night which helps stimulate natural melatonin. I like it better than the light box I tried, even though it's not the same "lux" value. There's some good info at Light Therapy for Depression, and this circadian rhythm questionnaire can help you figure out what time is best for you to start morning light exposure if you're interested.

I also use Gentle Alarm for Android. Much better than a blaring alarm clock when you need to get up. Gentle Alarm has a setting that makes me do a mini puzzle in order to turn the alarm off, so I don't just keep hitting the snooze button.

Eating a breakfast with protein no later than 10am, and eating regular meals throughout the day really helps. I try to not eat at least an hour before I go to sleep.

I take my medication when I get up in the morning, because it has a stimulant effect and it can interfere with my sleep if I take it too late. Same thing with caffeine.

Exercise - either vigorous or a relaxing walk - during the day really helps. Even in the winter when it's grey there is still a lot of light around noon, so I'll go for a walk then when I can. I can't exercise any later than 5pm or I'll have a hard time relaxing at night.

Regular relaxation - taking short relaxation breaks throughout the day, like walking somewhere or stretching, help me not get too "amped up." I'm also supposed to try something like relaxation breathing or stretching as part of my sleep hygeine, but I usually just read.

Not staring at a computer or TV screen for at least an hour before I go to bed helps, and I have F.lux on my computer which changes the monitor settings so it's not so bright at night.

I used to fall asleep with the radio on a lot too, sometimes the TV. If you need some background noise try relaxing music, nature sounds, guided meditations (corny but as effective as the BBC), or use a sleep timer on the radio so it's not on all night. Even though the sound helps you fall asleep it supposedly will interfere with your deep sleep cycle, which can have repercussions on mood.

When I get really off track I do take Ambien or another sleeping pill, and my doctor says it's better to do that and get good sleep than get back on a bad cycle. When I'm good about my daily schedule I find that I naturally get sleepy around 11 and look forward to going to sleep, instead of wondering how long I'll be laying there trying to fall asleep.

Couple of simple suggestions here:
I find it helps if I drink a small glass of milk.
Some prefer warm milk.
But I find what really helps me is to read a prose book, paperback or otherwise, that I'm really enjoying. Do a couple of chapters while curled up in the couch or your easy chair, with no other distractions or noise. I find I get sleepy within about 20 minutes to a half an hour. Try it.

Once your sleep/wake schedule is out of synchrony it does take some work to bring it back into a more normal pattern. Day/night rhythms are always harder to recognize in the dead of winter where it gets dark so early and light so late. We are on the side of the winter solstice where days are lengthening but for the immediate time it is still fairly lopsided to the darker side. But just as pulling a late or all-nighter can be stressful when you have a good day/night slumber pattern, so may be getting back to that now that you have an alternate cycle in process. I want to bring your attention to a number of factors that can affect your sleep/wake cycles and make a suggestion on how to get back on a more conventional track.

Forcing yourself to rise is difficult to do, especially if it is going to put you at a situational deficit for the short window of time. Consider how you are winding down the day to get to sleep in the first place. Sometimes people try going from high speed activity to bed and find getting relaxed for sleep is something they are doing in their bed. Crawling into bed ready for sleep feeling weary and ready to rest is the best scenario, so getting to the point to approach that moment is important. You can wind down the sensory impacts of loud music, bright lights, television by lowering volumes, using lamp dimmers and turning to a period of reading for enjoyment. Enjoy a shower or bath for relaxing and change into sleep clothes and have a warm drink of something without caffeine or alcohol. It isn't silly to have a real plan to how you will eventually get to bed. When reclined in bed use some relaxation techniques to systematically tense and relax various parts of your body. Think about pleasant times and places, use some internal affirmations about being sleepy and enjoying your sleep and dreams, breathing exercises for calming yourself can help. All of these techniques will take some research and learning to find out how to do them and what works for you.

During your awake time in the day make sure you are getting enough light in your environment. A trip to Ikea or thrift stores can be easy ways to buy more lamps and brighten up your home during dark dreary days. Getting outside for even muted daylight is very healthy. On the tech side you can purchase artificial dawn generators/timers that hook up to a light where you sleep and slowly raise the light level so your eyes and brain register a "dawn" waking experience.

Also an aside about inside air quality - be sure to air out your living space regularly and look to eliminate sources of molds and mildew (that can really stress your immune system and tire you). On the other front if you are getting static electricity shocks from walking around your place the relative humidity is too low for good respiratory health and you need to get more moisture in the air.

Because you are on medication your off-norm schedule is also probably affecting your mealtimes and perhaps the time of day you take your medications which can affect your brain cycles of wakefulness.

As you plan to normalize your sleep/wake schedule try to make the change gradual so that you are only working on earlier to bed times and wake times that change by 30 or even less (maybe more) minutes at a time. You will be more successful at moving your brain and energy cycles with small nudges (your success will tell you what interval to use).

I think it works when part of a holistic approach. From the perspective that mindfulness brings to therapy, a great way to approach habitual negative thinking is to notice it happening. When you are thinking negatively, is it familiar?
I know, for myself at least, that lots of negativity is from the past, and that thinking "the same thing is happening again" often makes me feel resigned to let things go that route again. I think some good points have been made here about honoring negative feelings when they are authentic, and we do have the choice about where we want to encourage our mind and energy to go in the present. It is hard work, but at a certain point, what else are we going to do?

As a long term lifestyle solution, consider getting a dog. I used to have the same problem, could never sleep til 3, then overslept, had winter-funk type issues and was just out of whack.

The dog fixed it. Dog will let me hit the snooze button once or twice, but he gets fed at 8 AM and he knows what time that is. My dog forces me out of bed and keeps me on a fairly reasonable schedule, despite the fact that I'm naturally a night owl.

Funny thing about having a dog, you kind of sync your schedules without much effort on the human's part. The dog kind of makes it happen for you and keeps it even.

There are a lot of great dogs at the Seattle/King County Humane Society and Seattle Purebred Dog Rescue who would love to help you out.

http://www.seattlehumane.org/

http://www.spdrdogs.org/

Do you read or watch TV in bed? Or otherwise hang out in your bed before sleep?

What I've heard about mild cases of insomnia is to:
- Don't hang out in bed, only sleep in bed
- AM exercise is preferable to PM exercise
- Obvious caffeine avoidance in the PM, you could be more sensitive to it then you were in undergrad.

These would a few easy actions to take to try to induce an earlier bed time.

I feel your pain though. I currently work a second shift work schedule, M-F I do not need an alarm clock, Saturday and Sunday I do.

And spending all day and all night in the exact same artificially lit environment, emotionally 3am is just the same as 9am -- nice inside and only wanting to go outside when I need to.

If you're not too inconvenienced by your sleep schedule, you could try waiting out February to see what March brings. Our days should be noticeably longer and the morning birds noticeably louder then.

If you do want to go the alarm clock route to change your schedule now, I'd suggest one of those ease you into being awake alarm clocks. I've got an app for my phone, Sleep as an Android. It's more like your body eased you out of sleep than a loud noise interrupting your sleep, which for me just makes me want to sleep more out of spite.
[which is very easy to do if you don't really have to be awake AND you know you can stay up late with no repercussion]