Personally I find the technology interesting, admire the skill involved, but find the whole exercise to be a sad glorification of militarization. I somewhat enjoy watching them because I do like watching skilled pros do their job, but what it all stands for just makes me tired.

"Alexei Fyodorovich Karamazov was the third son of Fyodor Pavlovich Karamazov, a landowner in our district who became a celebrity (and is remembered to this day) because of the tragic and mysterious end he met exactly thirteen years ago, which will be described in its proper place."

Dostoyevsky, "The Brothers Karamazov", although I have to throw down votes also for "100 Years of Solitude", "Lolita" and "Ulysses". So many great, wonderful choices.

Tofurkey is wonderful, and easy to make and easy to find in the freezer section of your local PCC. Yeah, its tofu, so it violates your caveat....but wow...its great.

I would also suggest tempeh, which has a wonderful meat like texture. Try making a baste of olive oil, toasted sesame oil, and garlic; soak the tempeh in the baste for 1 hour (in the fridge) and then fry with the veggies of your choice.