About Lill

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  Getting over performance anxiety

  0 0 See a doctor. You need to make sure there are no health issues present. Not that saying, "My erection isn't happening, even when I want it to," is an easy conversation, but you do need to rule out any health issues. And then... Well, forget about sex for a while. I mean, masturbate as much as you want, but stop having intercourse with others. Get to know yourself and what pleases you. Once you feel comfortable with that, and know there are no medical issues, and that you can "muster up a good erection" when you want to for your own pleasure, try dating and understand that getting an erection isn't the end goal of a date. Anyone who pressures you or makes you feel bad for not having an erection is pretty much useless to you; you already have anxiety around the issue, so they are just making it more difficult. Enjoy your own body and buy some toys. Feel comfortable with your body and your sexuality. Watch some porn. Learn how to give yourself an erection and play with it. After all that fun time playing with yourself, you should be fairly overwhelmed with the desire to have sex. Your erections will direct their own movies and purchase property and possibly invest in your 401k. Best of luck! Lill answered in Sex & Relationships about 1 year ago Answer, comment & read 3 more answers »

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  Anybody know of any good winter drinking games?

  1 0 Drink when you see a snowflake. Lill answered in Food & Drink about 1 year ago Answer, comment & read 3 more answers »

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  lezzie drama regarding hpv disclosure

  0 0 First, kudos to RM for giving the important info about HPV. That is something you should digest carefully, and also, talk to your doctor about the HPV vaccine and whether that is appropriate for you. Second, should you rat on the blabbermouth? Well, it seems clear to me that your girl, let's call her George, is using safe practices with respect to her STD. The other girl, let's call her Bess, is broadcasting information to people who are not sexually involved with George about things they only need to be know if they are sexually involved with George. So, basically, Bess is being a douche. Do you tell George that Bess is being a douche? That depends upon whether you care about George and how much you want to be friends with Bess. If you care about George enough, you may want to let her know that her douche bag friend Bess is treating her like a leper. If you want to stay friends with Bess then you may not want to characterize her as a complete waste of space and a, did I mention, douche bag. When I was a kid and we played Nancy Drew, abolutely no one wanted to be Bess. Ever. Lill answered in Sex & Relationships about 1 year ago Answer, comment & read 2 more answers »

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  Is it over?

  0 0 When I saw the title of your question, "Is it over?" I immediately said to myself, "yes" without reading your full question. If you aren't in a place where you can ask him this question yourself, it's over. I did read the question, and my answer remains the same. You guys don't have an emotional connection. You are asking for advice from random strangers instead of talking to your partner. If you were in a new relationship I might change that answer, but you've been together 5 years. It's done, it's not gonna get better, time to ask a question about how to end a 5-year relationship without hurting him. Sorry, I know it sucks. Lill answered in Sex & Relationships over 2 years ago Answer, comment & read 8 more answers »

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  So, I'd like advice on asking out a girl.

  3 0 Ok. Say this: I think you are cute and sweet. Wanna go for coffee? If she says no, be polite and move on. 'Nuff said. Lill answered in Sex & Relationships over 2 years ago Answer, comment & read 7 more answers »

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  The perfect nap?

  0 0 I've read that the sleep cycle is 45 mins. long. If true, the perfect nap lets you wind down and fall asleep and achieve that full 45 mins once you fall asleep. So the lead-up where you are getting ready to sleep doesn't count to the 45 mins. I don't know if that is true, but, I think a napping project would be in order. A project about napping! That requires you to nap! I cannot imagine a more delightful exercise. Keep notes and let us know about the results. Lill answered in Whatever over 2 years ago Answer, comment & read 8 more answers »

• Comment on Lill's answer…

  0 0 True, not everyone is a creep. She is potentially making herself available to those who are, though. And I don't want to write any new laws, I want to make sure people are aware of existing ones. She's free to do what she wants, and she should be. But, it is a really, really, really bad idea. That is all. Lill commented over 2 years ago

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  How irresponsible is it to go pick up some random person at last call?

  0 1 It is very irresponsible for you to do this and also for any guy to accept. In many states, someone who is inebriated cannot give legal consent. Dudes, stay away from strange drunk chicks at last call. ISC, watch a few episodes of one of the many crime shows on television that feature people being raped and murdered, and imagine what it would feel like for your life to end in a similar manner. Predators have finely-tuned abilities regarding picking out people in a crowd who make easy prey. I'm going to depart from the script here and suggest you need to get some issues worked out before you even think about going to a bar and/or posting ads anywhere. There are better ways to become more confident, while learning new tricks at the same time. For example, buy a nice, unassuming toy, and spend some time getting to know it. Learn how to do fun things to it (with no one there to criticize your performance!) and discover how it can be used to please you. You can even take it on long, sunset strolls and talk about your feelings. Specifically, talk to it about how difficult it is for you to interact socially unless you are drunk. Hone your conversational skills. Tell your new friend all about how you are worth so much more than a one-night stand and/or axe-murdering. And believe it. Lill answered in Sex & Relationships over 2 years ago Answer, comment & read 6 more answers »

• See all of my 0 Questions , 7 Answers and 1 Comment