I kind of hope the Rapture comes soon. The post-Rapture parties are going to be AWESOME.

You seem like a smart woman. Instead of expecting a new outcome with your unsuccessful approach, why not take another tack on the problem?

If you want to date guys you "like," here is a simple plan for success:

1) Identify a guy you like
2) Ask him out
3) Repeat as necessary until you enter into your desired romance

Try it.

Are you 13 or are you 26, as you said in this thread? http://questionland.com/questions/20139-where-can-i-meet-some-wealthy-older-divorced-or-widowed-female-in-seattle

Either way, you probably shouldn't have sex.

Guinness is a great beer for kids. On tap, it is creamy and chocolate-y. Also, it is good warm, so you can leave it in a sippy cup for an hour or so if junior likes to "nurse" his beer.

Once junior gets hooked on the stuff, you can buy cans for home consumption. The nitro chargers make a fun prize for him to extract with his wee little fingers. Just make sure that he doesn't cut himself on the aluminum edges when he gets too soused for fine motor control.

From a merchandising perspective, the whole idea is to make the store as maze-like as possible without pissing you off so much that you never return.

Given that Whole Foods' clientele probably see the store as the only place in which they can possibly purchase organically-grown cotton swabs along with grass-fed Washington beef, they are likely willing to put up with more than most. And as they wander from the imported cheeses to pick up their feminine hygiene products made of sea sponge, hey look! A hemp tote bag with the Nagari OM symbol!

You get the picture. It's probably Whole Foods. I imagine the QFC on Broadway is probably tailored more to confusing drunks/stoners who have the munchies.

How about a pinata... Full of blood?

Maybe a jello wrestling tournament for her and her friends? Use cherry flavor for color, and throw in some crushed bing cherries for texture.

A 21-tampon salute? Maybe a pad parade?

What are you going to do when your son starts "coming of age?" Maybe you can plan ahead and reuse some materials (goggles, etc).

Most marijuana that is bought for recereational use in Washington comes from California or British Columbia. It's true that some BC growers have been known to do business with Mexican gangs, and that some growers in California get violent when protecting grow sites, but it's certainly not always the case.

The only way to remove all doubt about your pot coming sans violence is to buy locally and inform yourself. Know your dealer, don't deal with people that are not ethical, and ask them about their sources. Without getting too nosy about specifics, of course.

Here you go:

I like mine with lots of Tapatio.

You sound like quite a catch. Neither of them deserve you! Instead, you should fuck yourself.

To paraphase Woody Allen, the best part about masturbation is that it is sex with someone you love.